Judges 19: A Most Vicious Gang Rape

On another occasion a Levite, who lived in Ephraim, had a major falling out with his concubine. In a huff, she decided to return to her father’s house in Bethlehem, which was in Judah. After about four months, the Levite decided it was time to make up with her, so he traveled to Bethlehem to fetch her.

When he got there, her father was delighted to see him, and kept feasting him, and urging him to stay another night. After about a week, however, the Levite grew tired and insisted it was time for them to be returning to Ephraim.

Genesis 19: Sodom, Gomorrah and Lot and his Daughters

The angels then proceed onto Sodom, to check out things in preparation for smiting. When Lot sees them in the town square, looking around, he invites them to his house for the night. After dinner, while Lot’s in the process of settling his guests for the night, a mob of dudes come, no doubt drunkenly, banging on Lot’s door, yelling for them to send out his guests because they wanna fuck ’em. Lot eases out the door and tries to talk some sense into this violent mob of men who view sex as a right that they can inflict on anyone they see as lesser. Lot’s all, hey guys, right, those men, yes, yes, they’re hot and they owe, sure whatever, but, guys, hey hey, that’s not cool guys, we can’t just rape everyone that comes to town that we think is hot. That’s not cool, guys. That’s a dick move that violates ancient customs of hospitality. That’s the kind of move that pisses God off. But hey, you guys are horny and all riled up, I get it, I really do. But you can’t rape those guys. I know you gotta rape, but not them, see? But hey guys, hey, I got two virgin daughters. How ’bout you rape them instead? I’ll go get ’em for you and everything. And I won’t expect any payment, guys I promise. Rape them all you want, k?