Genesis 8

Eventually the flood ended, as floods usually do, and the smelly, crowded boat landed on an island that turned out to be the top of Mount Ararat after sea levels subsided more. Noah was a cautious dude and wouldn’t let anybody off the boat for awhile, just to make sure the coast was clear. He spent a few weeks sending out birds to see if they would come back for want of anywhere else to roost. After the third bird, he decided it was safe, and everyone finally got off the poop cruise.

But all was not well for everything. Noah felt the need to kill and burn a bunch of the “clean” animals to thank God for saving him and his crew. God then felt bad for smiting everything out of boredom.

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